I remembered when 2006, I was kicked out from the Uni without a degree. In fact those days I thought those four years in the faculty of Engineering were an utter waste of my precious youth but some fun. Thereafter for nearly a year, I was crying down all the streets in Colombo, amidst the ghosts of wars, without a peny in hand, asking jobs. Then I started to feel the real life. I started to realize – there is always a unique battle for every man. There - Yes, It’s the same challenge we all have in life – difference is how we take it. I went for nearly thirty interviews during this time; they all wanted to interview me not because they respected what I am and what I want to be. But they worth the University name and Good results i had behind my O/L A/Ls. Trying to be always me and trying keep what I am, I failed every time pathetically. I realize we always have to change. We can’t stay what we were yesterday when it comes to the game of survival. But when it comes to the world of virtues – yes you can be what you are and remain what you believe. The game of balancing the world of survival and the world of virtues is perhaps the secret of success, when success is measured based to the intrinsic happiness and genuine inner peace.
There is always time in life – we have to do things, which we don’t want to. Even to understand and clarify what you really want to be; what you really worth in your life, you l have to do random things first and finalize the boundaries of your scope. So it was hell terrible at which others think a critical age, I thought I must better get some skills which I never had before. I hated computing. I hated computers. I even hated people talk about computers. But the environment never changed – so I had to change my perceptions. I was without a degree when I was 26. But enormous hard work and tears, I can be happy – while doing a job, I was with two degrees, and a Masters, Some professional certifications and PMP, when I was twenty nine. Damn!!! Then only I realize having 1000 certifications may not take you to the world you are dreaming of. You have to create something yourself. I never wanted car, I never wanted to be some famous academics – and yet I couldn’t find whom should I wanted to be. I know I am expecting for a drastic change to my life which I didn’t know how to make and then from where to start. I was so greedy to be loved, and yet so very passionate to travel across the world – then none of my dreams come true, but attempts have always ended in stormy disasters. There was always a drive in me like for majority, which it want to see me been some body. Throughout the past endeavors, there may be left few many bones damageless – but haven’t earn anything I thought I deserved. Even by today these reasons remain still a secret. But I know I must not suspect. If you suspect your self – nobody else is going to believe you, and nobody else going to make your dreams true.
The experience I earn hard may be not worthy for somebody else. But that help me feel at least another secret. There is always a difference between understanding without feeling and realizing things with feelings. Latter is the best as long as you don’t forget the lessons learnt. Even the most successful people in the world may have done something not very smart as we initially presume’. Majority may have continued long time what they believed on. Then they master than the others. With that they may have concord the world of confidence. Curing takes time. You only have to wait and keep hopes with faith. We can’t master many things – because best is only one thing.
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